


Introductions: Raquel GutierrezRamon

by kateydidnt



Series: Botosphere [8]
Category: Transformers (Bay Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-16
Updated: 2012-05-16
Packaged: 2017-11-05 11:34:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/405941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kateydidnt/pseuds/kateydidnt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part of Eowyn77's Introductions series. A survivor of the Battle of Mission City gets a chance to meet her hero.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a TIE IN to the fic The Daily Buzz, chapter 7 (The Crappy Town Where I'm A Hero). It will be worlds funnier if you read that chapter first.

I left the courthouse feeling pretty darn pleased with myself. The deposition had gone better than expected. Under a little pressure, the prosecution's primary witness had offered contradictory testimony. If he took the stand, we would impeach him. Emerson, the prosecutor, would be much more willing to negotiate a plea deal after today.

When the elevator doors of the parking garage opened, however, the day took an immediate turn for the worse. Parked next to my beloved truck was an identical vehicle – a souped-up black GMC Topkick. David! He'd teased me for years now about my obsession with the black alien robot who had saved my life, but I couldn't imagine my husband going to _these_ lengths. I mean, Topkicks aren't cheap, and to buy another one as a prank... He must have rented it or something.

I set my jaw and marched over to the trucks. I would have no problem telling which one was mine. As I got closer, though, a stranger got out of the Topkick to the right. My pace slowed to a stop.

"Mrs. Raquel Gutierrez-Ramon?" the stranger said. "Known online as MyBBB?"

"Yes?"

"I am Major William Lennox. I'd like to have a word with you."

Still suspecting a prank, I sidled closer. "There are surveillance cameras," I warned him.

He stepped forward to the edge of my personal space. "I am fully aware of that." He glanced over his shoulder at the truck. "And so is he."

Oh, please! "How much did David pay you to do this?"

"I assure you, ma'am, this is no joke."

"Uh-huh. Sure."

The truck's engine roared to life beside me and it inched forward. The windows rolled down, even though I couldn't see anyone in the cab. "Raquel," a deep voice said, and the passenger-side door popped open on its own. "Please get in."

I looked uncertainly from the truck to the major and back again. Did it just _speak_ to me? Or did they have a CD in the player so they could mess with my mind? But it was moving without a driver. It went against every ounce of intelligence to get into a stranger's vehicle. I mean, this had kidnapping written all over it. But...what if it _was_ the robot?

"And if I don't?"

The truck door shut, though the windows stayed down. It seemed to be the equivalent of stepping back, but keeping a hand extended in...friendship, maybe. Then again, if this thing had military ties, friendship was definitely too much to ask for.

The deep voice from the cab said, "Then they'll shut down your site without a word of explanation, and just guessing from your gumption and career choice, you'll spend the rest of your life in a free-speech lawsuit. If you come with me, then you'll at least get an explanation. And some resolution."

The military was shutting down my site. My heart sank, absolutely plummeted. I half-worried this might happen eventually, but I hadn't really _expected_ it. All of the video we posted was recorded by members – it wasn't like we were posting stuff we'd stolen from the government. And I didn't post anything that was _obviously_ illegally obtained, though I tended to not delve too deeply. I looked to the major again. "This really isn't a joke."

"No," he said, dead serious. "It isn't. You're welcome to follow me in your own vehicle, but all things considered, I thought you would prefer to ride with Ironhide."

David wasn't anywhere near creative enough for this. I eyed the truck again and stepped closer. To the major, I said, "May I inspect the interior first?"

"Of course."

The passenger-side door opened again, and I climbed in, keeping an eye on Major Lennox. The door slammed shut and the locks jammed down. "There. You're safe from your fellow human. He's not getting in unless I say so, and I won't let him in until you're satisfied. Now do you feel better?"

My hands flew to my face, covering my mouth in surprise. "It's really you."

The engine idled hard, shaking the whole vehicle, and the voice – it was indeed coming from the stereo – chuckled. "Yes, Raquel. It's really me."

He said my name. My robot hero knew my name! "But how...why...?"

"This isn't the best place for an explanation. Are you willing to come with me and Major Lennox? I can vouch for him. He's a personal friend."

"Anywhere," I whispered in wide-eyed wonder. "You can take me anywhere."

The locks released and Major Lennox opened the driver-side door. "You ready?"

I nodded, not really trusting my voice.

He put the robot in gear – his name was Ironhide, I remembered – and drove forward, out of the parking garage.

"You let a human drive you?" I asked.

"He won't be able to talk to you while we're around other vehicles," Major Lennox said. "The technology he uses to talk through the radio's speakers is vaguely similar to an FM transmitter. He projects a signal of his voice that will come through any speakers that are turned on within about 10 feet. Once we're away from civilization a little bit more, you'll be able to carry on a conversation. In the meantime, yes, he permits me to drive in the interest of blending in."

"But he can hear me?"

"Yes."

Addressing Ironhide, I said, "I've dreamed of being able to meet you, but I never thought I'd ever see you again. I just wanted to say thank you. Ironhide. Thank you for saving my life." I was on a first-name basis with him! He couldn't answer, of course, but I was almost deliriously happy at finally being able to say the words.

Lennox grinned, shaking his head slightly. After a moment, he said, "I don't want anyone to ever have a reason to take a second look at the surveillance tapes from the garage. Is there someone who would report you missing?"

"Oh. Yeah. Let me call the office and my husband." I pulled out my cell phone and hesitated before dialing. "How late should I tell them we'll be?"

" _You'll_ be gone for at least 2 hours. Officially, this meeting isn't happening, and you've never met Ironhide. Think up a cover story. The drive is an hour one way. I assume you'll want to spend a little time chatting with Ironhide, so maybe give yourself three hours? Four?"

Ironhide's engine made a sound suspiciously like a groan, and I bit my lip in worry. I didn't want to annoy him and overstay my welcome. Three hours, then. Any excuse that could reasonably detain me that long could also detain me for another hour, if we did end up talking longer. I pulled David up on the speed dial and punched 'Send.'

"Hey, baby."

"Hey, _guapeton_ ," I answered. "Something's come up. On a case. Can't tell you what, of course – confidentiality and all – but I won't be home until late."

"How late?" he pouted.

"I should be home around ten o'clock, but it might run a little later. Call Gary or Raul and catch a movie and _cervesas_ , okay? I wouldn't want my man getting lonely."

"Only lonely for you, baby. I'll wait up for you."

I grinned. "Looking forward to it. Ciao."

Neither Major Lennox nor Ironhide commented, for which I was very grateful. Then I pulled up my office on speed dial.

When my secretary picked up, I said, "Carmen? It's Raquel. The deposition went well – make sure we get the transcript ASAP. Oh, and I won't be in again this evening. Something's come up. Tell any callers that I'll be in at six tomorrow morning like usual and I'd be happy to talk to them then."

"Will do. See you tomorrow."

"Ciao."

And with that, I belonged to Ironhide for the next three hours.

We rode in silence for a while, and through my euphoria, Ironhide's earlier words started to sink in again. They were shutting down my site. This wasn't a social call; it was a military operation to stifle my free speech. And while my legal mind was now on full alert, my silly fangirl heart couldn't bring me to see it that way. So what if they shut me down – I was joyriding with my BBB! My rights were being oppressively trampled on, and I couldn't quite bring myself to care.

Ironhide might not be able to talk, but I decided to get through the inevitable nastiness with the human rather than make my hero play the bad guy. "So what's your pretense for shutting me down?"

"I've got a laundry list," Lennox said genially. "Everything from Accessory to Breaking and Entering to Conspiracy to Commit Assault."

"Assault?" I winced, suddenly suspicious about where that one was going.

"Yeah. One of Ironhide's sidekicks was attacked due to a video you posted."

"Yellow Camaro?"

"Yep."

"Oh, no." I held up my hands defensively. "As long as you're piling up charges, you're not pinning _that_ on me."

"And why not?" Lennox retorted.

"That wasn't our fault; it was the evil robot's fangirls! They're always flaming my site and badmouthing the BBB. Besides, it's Yellow Camaro's own fault for being so conspicuous."

"Maybe it was girls from your site," he said evenly, "maybe not. But regardless, you _can_ be held accountable for posting video that was illegally obtained."

"Only if I did so knowingly."

Lennox sighed, abruptly frustrated. "Look, lady. We've been following your site for months now. My half of the team would have just pulled the plug, but Ironhide's half felt that was too heavy-handed. You wanna butt heads, fine, we'll butt heads. But first hear Ironhide out, okay? Or he and his buddies are going be ticked with me."

I pursed my lips, annoyed. They were already starting the good cop/bad cop routine. And, so unfairly that it was practically duress, they were giving Ironhide the role of good cop. I mean, how could I _not_ side with my superhero? How could I deny him anything he asked? He'd saved my life, and if I was reading correctly the bits and pieces I'd gleaned, he'd saved the whole darn planet.

"So what exactly do you want me to do?"

"Again, I'll let Ironhide explain that part."

"So I'm just supposed to play Tetris on my cell phone for the next hour?"

He grinned. "No. There's a reason Ironhide and I were the ones who picked you up."

I waited, but when he didn't explain, I took the bait. "And what's that?"

"I know a helluva lot of war stories about him."

Dammit. This battle was already lost. I ran up the white flag of surrender. "I suppose you're going to show embarrassing baby pictures of him, too," I deadpanned.

"Naw, I didn't know him when he was just a Hot Wheel."

I could tell just by the tone of his voice that he was smirking, but the engine revved in response to that. Now, _there_ was the attitude I knew and loved. I resisted the urge to stroke his shiny dashboard soothingly and changed the subject instead.

"What was really going on in Australia between BBB and YC? I mean, between Ironhide and..."

"Yellow Camaro works for now. It was a training exercise. We'd just killed one of the bad aliens and Ironhide was frustrated with Yellow Camaro getting, in Ironhide's mind, careless. They got talking smack – "

"Talking smack?" I interrupted. I tried to imagine my knight in shiny black armor talking smack...and couldn't.

He grinned. "They're guys, what do you expect? Anyway, Yellow Camaro basically said the only reason Ironhide wasn't damaged was because he has those monster cannons and challenged him to a _mano-a-mano_."

"So they were just buddies duking it out?"

"Sparring, more like."

"That was just _sparring?_ There were chunks of metal falling off them!"

"Yeah, their chief medical officer was less than pleased, but the others enjoyed the sport. Especially when Yellow Camaro won. Hasn't happened before or since, but the rest of them never let Ironhide live it down. Especially since you girls got it on tape."

I flushed, realizing my site had _embarrassed_ my hero.

"Care to hear another one?" Lennox offered.

Despite my chagrin, I couldn't resist. "Please."

The hour swiftly passed as Lennox regaled me with stories about Ironhide and his compatriots. He was careful, of course, using the nicknames I had assigned to Ironhide's various friends and never mentioning details about time or place. Still, I was enthralled the entire time.

I sobered when we entered Nellis Air Force Base. I knew he was military, but Major Lennox was in civilian clothes and had been pretty much disarmingly charming, other than telling me off at the beginning. This was the real deal. I wondered briefly if Ironhide wasn't just an inanimate Topkick with a fancy remote-control system – the military would have the resources to pull that off – but decided it was too late to chicken out now. One way or another, I was going through with this.

Major Lennox gave them his ID, getting us past the gate, and we continued on to a large hangar. Driving in, Lennox nodded to several men in camo who pulled the hangar doors shut. It felt very ominous to see the setting Nevada sun cut off by the imposing metal rolling closed. Lennox got out of the truck and came around to the passenger side, opening the door for me and offering his hand to help me climb out.

"We secure?" he asked one of the men.

"Yes sir."

Major Lennox shut the passenger side door, patted the front panel once in an almost manly-affectionate way, and said, "Alright, Ironhide. Let's get this over with."


	2. Chapter 2

Even though I'd already seen it once, even though I'd been hoping for this to be real, I still felt an icy rush of adrenaline when the imposing Topkick began to convert into the alien robot. Ironhide. It really, truly was Ironhide!

I think I even squealed when his head came into view. I definitely recall hearing several snickers.

"Getting this on tape?" Lennox murmured to one of his men.

"Yes sir."

When the conversion was done, the mighty robot stretched for a moment and then leaned down so we were eye to eye. No one had made a single aggressive move in the last hour, but Ironhide putting his face in my personal space was a terror like no other. "Hello, Raquel. We meet at last. And in regards to saving your life, my pleasure."

I shakily laughed, and he straightened, looking pleased with himself. I just stared, awestruck.

"I'm told that humans sustain damage in their necks from looking up to me all the time. Perhaps you would be more comfortable up here?" He gestured toward some wooden scaffolding a good fifteen feet off the ground. It was a bad time for me to be afraid of heights, and an even worse time to be in heels. Well, at least I could remedy one thing. I slipped my shoes off and my gaze followed the line of the scaffolding to the stairs, but a large metal hand blocked my way. "May I give you a lift?"

I definitely squealed that time, to another round of snickers.

I waited, expecting him to pick me up King-Kong style, but at my hesitation, he said, "Well, come on, then. Climb aboard." Sitting in his hand, my feet dangling like I was a kid on a swing set, I clung to his thumb for dear life until my feet were parallel with the scaffolding. I'd touched him! He'd held me in the palm of his hand! If it hadn't been for the fifteen-foot fall, I just might have fainted.

Major Lennox reached the top of the scaffolding in the more conventional way and came to stand beside me.

Ironhide stood a little straighter. "So, Raquel. You know why you are here."

I felt vaguely like a child in the Principal's office. "You're shutting down my site."

"No, I'm not."

I eyed him dubiously, and he continued, "You're here because I want to ask you, as a personal favor, to voluntarily take down your site."

I crossed my arms, feeling childishly sullen. It was just so _unfair_ to have _Ironhide_ ask this of me, especially when he put it that way.

"Will you hear my reasons?" he asked, reading my expression.

"Sure," I grudgingly allowed.

"First is the safety of my fangirls."

"Please. Don't be patronizing."

"I'm not," he grunted. "Isn't it bad enough that I have Mission City on my spark?"

"On his conscience," Major Lennox clarified.

"Remember Shanghai?" he continued. "That could have been a _real_ chemical spill. And that woman would have died."

"She took precautions."

"You're missing the point, Raquel. I have my hands full enough in battle. The last thing I need to worry about is having my admirers in the line of fire."

"So we'll be more careful, have tighter rules about obtaining video." Though, admittedly, that would mean far less footage.

"You think that will be enough?" Ironhide put his fists on his hips and harrumphed. He glared at me until I looked away, knowing he was right.

"And then," he continued, "there's the matter of my friend being hit in the headlight by a sledge-hammer."

"That wasn't my fault."

"You are the only ones, short of the US military, to have footage of every single one of our team's vehicle modes. Do you have any idea what kind of security risk that poses? That's how the evil robot's fangirls were able to find my friend, and you have it on display for every crackpot and conspiracy nut to see."

Despite the fact that it was Ironhide I was talking to, I started to get genuinely annoyed. "Do you have any idea how many sites bash you and your sidekicks? There are thousands! I've been to most of them, and none of them even entertain the idea that having _you_ here might actually be a _good_ thing. That's _why_ I started my site! All they see are evil, alien monsters. I'm the _only_ one who's defended you. I'm the _only_ one who allows people to see you for the good guys you really are."

"We don't _want_ people to see us for what we are," Ironhide exclaimed in frustration, his deep voice booming. "That's the whole problem. We choose these vehicle forms to blend in, to be invisible. We have a job to do, femme, and we can't do it if we're being chased by the fangirl paparazzi or are dodging sledgehammers – no matter who's wielding them. This isn't a game."

I pursed my lips, absolutely refusing to cry. "I only wanted justice for you."

Ironhide looked distinctly uncomfortable and glanced at the soldier beside me. "Um...Will, she's...can you...um...do something?"

Major Lennox pulled a clean handkerchief from his pocket and offered it to me. I took it with ill grace and dabbed at the corners of my eyes. Stupid tears.

"Mrs. Gutierrez-Ramon," the man said, "we understand the sentiment behind your website. What Ironhide's trying to say is that you'll do more for our cause by offering your quiet support than by broadcasting to the world where he is, what he looks like, and who he's with."

"Please, Raquel," Ironhide added, more comfortable now that I wasn't tearing up. "Take down your site. For me."

"Dammit," I growled. "You're ruthless."

"Will you?" Ironhide pressed.

I sighed, wavering.

"Voluntarily?" he added.

I looked heavenward, the tears starting up again. I could think of half a dozen ways in which this would never stick in court, if they tried to hold me to it through legal channels. But I knew in my heart that I couldn't deny Ironhide. If I agreed to this, then I agreed to it. "Yes," I grumbled, my heart breaking.

Ironhide all but beamed approval. "Thank you, Raquel."

I shrugged, not trusting my voice.

To the soldiers, Ironhide said, "You can stand down now." Then he extended his hand to me again.

I forced down the tears, determined to enjoy the last few minutes I'd have with him, and climbed into his palm. To my surprise, he didn't set me down, instead slowly walking across the hangar. "You've done me a great personal favor," he said. "Is there a favor you would ask of me in return?"

I looked at him sharply. "You're serious."

He looked at me like I was insulting him. "Of course."

I sat there, tears forgotten, jaw hanging open as I tried to gather my thoughts.

"How about I start by answering the 'Top Ten Questions for the BBB' from your site?"

"You've visited my site?" I breathed.

He grinned. "It's in my favorites."

I brushed away the last of the tears. Somehow, it didn't seem like as big of a sacrifice to take down my site knowing that _Ironhide_ followed it. After all, he'd be losing a favorite, too.

"There's a smile from my fangirl," he said. Then with a sound suspiciously like a sigh, he said, "Let's see. The first one was the shortest. Boxers or Briefs?"

I blushed. "For the record, that was a poll, not my own, personal question."

He waved away my protests (with the _other_ hand instead of the one I was sitting in, thankfully). "Doesn't matter. I'm sure you're curious, too."

I flushed to the ears. Yes, but I wasn't about to admit that to him.

"Had to look that one up," he admitted. "And it took even longer to find the appropriate response."

He waited until I finally blurted out, "Which is?"

Ironhide winked. "I go commando."

Blushing scarlet, I choked back a snigger and Ironhide chuckled. "Seriously, femme, did you fangirls pay any attention? We don't wear clothes."

"There was speculation about the armor…" I managed to mumble.

"I know. I read the thread. Load of slag."

I happily sighed again, realizing he'd been a part of my life _all this time_ and I didn't know it. "Wait! Do you have a user account?"

"No, I wasn't allowed. But I visit the site several times a day. So…next question. 'Have you ever been bi-curious and is that even _possible_ for a robot?' Who thought up this question anyway?" he grumbled.

"I believe it was BBBFanboy," I muttered, desperately trying to remember how many of the sexual questions were in the top ten. This could turn out to be a humiliating evening. "We were wondering since one of the motorcycles was blue."

Ironhide harrumphed. "Well to answer the question, we have no sexes, though we do have gender identities, and I'm a straight shooter."

The blush that had been fading burned on my cheeks again. I wondered if the pun was intentional or not and decided that after the 'commando' crack, it probably was. Gah, what a mental image!

"The answers to the third and fourth questions are related. 'How does a girl get into the Trio?' The Trio is actually one robot. When she converts, as you call it, the three bikes combine."

WOW! In all the dozens of threads devoted to the BBB's love life, it had never occurred to any of us that The Trio wasn't three individuals.

"As for 'Are you available, and if so, what do you look for in a girl?' I already have a femme, and she won my spark by scoring more kills than me in two consecutive battles and tying with me on the third."

"Is she the Trio?" I asked.

"No, the Trio is my sister-in-law, in human terms. And for the record, my mate is blue."

_My mate._ It sounded so…so primal. I found myself blushing again.

"Let's see…Question number five. 'Have you ever met Klingons/Jedis/Timelords/God?' No to all of the above, but we have a creator-god named Primus, and I hope it's a good, long time before I meet _him_."

I had to concur.

"The sixth question was, 'What is your favorite kill move?' In Mortal Kombat, it's Brutality, but in real life…" he lifted the arm opposite me and spun an enormous, ominous cannon. "…double cannon-blast to the spark."

I shakily laughed. Only once had one of us fangirls caught footage of those cannons in action, and it's not something you forget. Seeing that empty black barrel – even if it wasn't pointed at me – was enough to give me an adrenaline rush of fear.

"Seventh question: 'What's your sign?' Time doesn't translate well from my planet to yours. If you go by when we arrived on Earth, I'm an Aquarius, but in terms of personality, I'm definitely an Aries."

"I'm getting that vibe."

He chuckled. "I thought you were grateful I was a gung-ho, hardened warrior."

"I was. I mean, I am. But…"

Leaning in a little closer, he turned his bright blue eyes on me. "Yes?"

"Well, to be perfectly honest, you're rather intimidating."

He threw he head back and roared with laughter. "Good! I'd hate to disappoint you. Now where were we? Ah yes, question eight. 'You vs. Schwarzenegger for governor – who would win?" He harrumphed. "Me, hands down. Oh, wait. You have a democracy – never mind. I'd call it a draw."

I chuckled. He'd obviously rehearsed some of these, but at least in this case, the sentiment was genuine. "Yeah, not the most efficient way to run things, but history teaches us that scatterbrained governments tend to treat its citizens more justly than highly-efficient ones."

Ironhide cocked his head. "An interesting theory. I wonder what my leader would think of that."

"You have a leader?"

He rumbled a chuckle. "Yes. I'll tease him until he offlines about your mistake, though. He's Flaming Semi."

I colored again. "Yeah, there was a subversive movement on the message boards arguing that he was the real leader of your group. What about Search and Rescue? Does he rank higher or lower?"

"Neither, really. He's our medic. We don't go in for much of a hierarchy. We follow Flaming Semi because we want to. If he chooses a lieutenant and we trust Flaming Semi's judgment, then we follow the lieutenant, too. So…on to question number nine. 'What's your guilty pleasure?'" He eyed me closely and his voice dropped to a whisper. "Are you sure you want the answer to this one? Because if I tell you, and my enemies get their hands on you, you'll have to die before you divulge it."

I swallowed once and then tried to calculate the chances of his enemies ever bothering with an insignificant nobody like me. "I'm a lawyer," I said with surety. "I know all about confidentiality."

"Fine. But this is just between us. You never breathe a word about it. You carry it to your grave. Understand?"

Wide-eyed, I nodded.

"There's a two-year-old girl I enjoy babysitting."

"That's it?" I blurted out. "Just…babysitting?"

He glanced over his shoulder at the men congregated on the other side of the hangar, talking in a loose circle. "Not so loud. And it's not _just_ babysitting. We make cookies and play dress-up and I blow bubbles for her. If my enemies found out, it would be _humiliating._ I'd have to single-handedly wipe out an entire squadron to ever have any respect again."

I shook with fits of silent giggles, trying to imagine how a twenty-foot-tall warrior robot made cookies with a two-year-old. And the mental image of him _blowing bubbles_ …. "You are so full of it. But that's okay. You probably aren't allowed to tell me your real guilty pleasure. Please go on."

He shook his head and then sighed. "And last but not least. If you could change one thing about Mission City, what would it be?" Genuine sadness crept into his voice. "I actually have three answers to this one. One of my best friends died in that battle, so my knee-jerk answer would be that he lived. But then there were so many humans who died that day."

"A hundred and twelve," I said softly. "And another two hundred and forty-three injured."

He nodded. "So when I had a chance to think about it, I would change that, and spare their lives instead of Jazz's."

He was serious. If he could have changed one thing, it would have been to save us aliens instead of his own friend. I realized my jaw was hanging open, and I closed it. "And your third answer?"

"That it never happened. Our arch-enemy died that day, but so did any hope for rebuilding our home world. And our enemies continue to hunt us, so the war we thought was over isn't. In some ways, it would have been better to keep fighting if it meant we still had hope."

Sadness swelled in my chest at the way he said it. He wasn't despairing or hopeless, really. Just…stoic.

"So," he continued almost brusquely, his voice rising to its previous volume. "I've answered your Top Ten Questions. Is there anything else you'd like from me?"

I blushed to the ears. "Um…"

"Oh, come on, Raquel. I know there must be at least one more thing you want."

The military men looked over at us, and Lennox started ambling our way, grinning.

"…well…"

"You can ask me anything."

"Anything?"

He nodded.

Ducking my head, I said, "Can I give you a kiss?"

Ironhide sputtered in surprise. "A kiss?"

Lennox, who was close enough to overhear us, burst out laughing.

My cheeks were burning, but I sullenly groused, "You did say anything."

Through his chortling, the human explained, "He was hoping you'd ask for a demonstration of his cannons."

OH! I remembered then a post I'd made after HotFS had caught the footage of his massive weaponry. I'd said that before I died, I wanted to see his cannons in action for myself. "But we're inside."

"Hasn't stopped him before," Lennox grumbled. In a louder voice, he added, "You _did_ ask for it, 'Hide."

"You can have a kiss, too, I suppose," the robot muttered, lifting me closer to his face. Feeling more than half-crazy, I unsteadily climbed to my feet, keeping a hand on the top of his thumb for balance. He held me up to what passed for his cheek – a large, round plate with an alien glyph on it. The height was dizzying, but in the back of my mind, I wondered what the glyph meant. I stored it away in my photographic memory so I could research it later. I wouldn't be surprised if the translation was somewhere out there on the internet. And then his massive face was close enough to touch. Leaning over as far as I could, I kissed the warm, smooth metal.

_WOW!_ Sliding back down to sitting, I hugged his thumb and squealed again, kicking my feet in delight. _I kissed Ironhide!_

Ironhide's deep, rumbling chuckle echoed through the hangar, mingling with the humans' laughter. I guess even kick-ass alien robot warriors can be flattered.

"Now, fangirl, do you want to see my cannons in action or not? Unlike my enemies, it won't be the _last_ thing you see before you die."

I looked up into his brilliant blue eyes, feeling like a kid on Christmas morning. "Really? Inside, though?"

"No, ma'am," Lennox said. "We've just been waiting for dark to use the bombing range."


	3. Chapter 3

"You're going to _love_ this, Raquel," Ironhide assured me as we turned off the pavement onto a dirt road.

The bombing range didn't look like much. Granted, it was nighttime, but when Ironhide (I was riding in Ironhide again! Squee!) turned left, his headlights swept the field in front of us. And that's all it was – a recently-plowed field. Ironhide brought us to a small set of bleachers and we got out.

A personnel carrier pulled up behind us, and Lennox escorted me to the bleachers while a flurry of activity erupted near the back of the carrier. I heard a metallic sound and turned to watch in awe as Ironhide converted into his robot shape again. I could watch that ten times a day for the rest of my life and still not get bored by it. He strode back to help the humans with whatever they were messing with in the back of the personnel carrier.

"This way, please, Mrs. Gutierrez-Ramon."

"You can call me Raquel," I said as I fell in step with him. "Especially for a gringo, that last name's a mouthful." Besides, he was part of Ironhide's entourage – we were all friends here.

"It is that," he agreed. He helped me climb to the top of the bleachers (darn these high heels), and took his seat beside me.

Looking around for something and not finding it, Lennox hollered, "Hey Ironhide…"

The amazing alien robot turned, his bright blue eyes both terrifying and thrilling in the darkness. "You forgot something," he huffed in answer and handed Lennox a backpack.

"Thanks." Lennox rummaged around in it for a moment and produced a bulky set of binoculars. "You ever use night-vision hardware before?"

This evening was turning out to be so freaking _cool_! "No."

"Here." He fiddled with the binoculars for a minute and then offered them to me. "Oh, and I've got some bottled water and a blanket in the pack, in case you get cold or thirsty."

I took the binoculars and looked through them. Everything was greenish, but I could clearly see the outline of sagebrush and a rock outcropping on the other side of the field, more than a mile distant. "Thanks. I'm fine."

"We're ready here," Ironhide rumbled, and I heard something whirr to life. Looking back over at him, I jumped to see three more alien robots.

"These are drones," Lennox soothingly explained as the other humans took their places on the bleachers. "Non-sentient robots used for combat scenarios. They were programmed for evasion – target practice, essentially. They won't harm you."

I nodded, my heart still racing, as they zipped out across the field, their eyes glowing a demonic red. Two of them stood on wheeled feet, while the third actually _flew_. Ironhide collapsed back down into his truck shape and raced off after the drones. I lifted the night-vision goggles to my eyes and took a deep breath.

Ironhide somersaulted out of his truck form, converting on the fly and bringing his cannons to bear mid-flip. Through the goggles, the flash was blinding and I jumped. One of the drones was clipped, flopping to the ground. But Ironhide had already converted back into his truck form and was racing across the uneven ground.

I let out a low whistle.

"Most of our operations are, unfortunately, in urban settings," Lennox said. "So we're trained for them to fight in vehicle mode as much as possible. Sometimes this is easier, sometimes not."

Ironhide was almost to the damaged drone now. As he circled it, one cannon pulled away from the front passenger panel and blasted the other robot to smithereens in a flash of brilliant light. "Wow!" I breathed.

"No joke."

My robot hero didn't stay to gloat, though. He was already speeding across the field, trying to corner the other ground drone. Cutting it off, the bed of his truck form extended, and he did a donut, delivering a robot round-house kick to the drone. My heart was thundering at the sheer power of the blow, which sent the other one flying. Converting to his full height, he lifted both arms and again the blinding flash turned everything I could see through the goggles a flat white. When the dazzle subsided, there was crater where the downed drone had been. Double cannon-blast to the spark. I grinned and punched the air. "You _go_ , stud!"

The human beside me sniggered.

Ironhide didn't convert back to his truck form, though. Instead, he looked up, searching the sky. "The aerial ones are the hardest," Lennox explained. "The enemy's ground-based robots have suffered the most casualties, so half of their remaining forces are flyers. It's forced even heavy-hitters like Ironhide to develop a little patience and finesse."

Lifting the angle of the goggles, I strained to find the aerial drone. "I don't see it."

"We set parameters for the distance the drones could go over the ground, but we didn't give the flyer a limit on height. The base has cleared the airspace for us tonight. Ironhide insisted." Under his breath, Lennox grumbled, "Show off."

Looking back to said show-off, I saw that he had his arms raised almost straight up. "He sees it."

"Kind of. They have advanced sensors, of course, and he's tracking it. Problem is, that's a little flyer. That high up makes it a very small, very agile target. Like shooting flies with a BB gun."

The mighty cannons fired again. "Did he get it?"

After a second of hesitation, Lennox said, "No. You might want to watch this part without the night-vision."

Pulling the binoculars away, I squinted in the darkness, barely making out the enormous shape of Ironhide – a deeper black against the night. Two orbs of blue and orange light began to glow near him, and I realized they were his cannons warming up. Then he fired again, illuminating him and the surrounding ground like a flash of lightning. This time, there was an explosion in the sky, brilliant gold and silver. Beautiful! Yes, I was very glad I got to see that one with the naked eye. Lifting my binoculars again, I saw him nod his head in satisfaction as glowing, metallic shards rained down around him.

Shakily laughing, I whispered, "Wow!"

He looked our way, almost like he had overheard me, and began _running_ toward us. Charging like a bull. I shrank back, and Lennox chuckled beside me. Leaping forward and up, Ironhide flipped midair, firing both his cannons when he was face-down. The force was like a handspring and he landed on his feet about fifteen yards away. Lowering the binoculars again, I stared at him, speechless. Only the whirring of a fan – cooling vents? – broke the silence of the desert night.

"Well, Raquel?" Ironhide rumbled, his blue eyes at once awesome and eerie against the darkness. "What do you think?"

It was a good ten seconds before I could speak again, and I blurted out, "Can I have your children?"

Lennox roared with laughter, but the glowing blue eyes moved as Ironhide cocked his head. "Translation?"

It took a few seconds for Lennox to catch his breath, he was laughing so hard. Between wheezes, he said, "She thinks you're one sexy truck."

"That only proves she has taste," Ironhide answered with approval. "But no, you may not have my children."

It was my turn to giggle, and I even heard a few guffaws from the other humans. Ironhide strode closer, while the military men spread out with metal detectors – probably cleaning up any incriminating alien technology. By the faint starlight, I saw Ironhide extend his hand, offering to carry me again. With a euphoric sigh, I climbed into his palm – the metal was much warmer this time – and he brought me over by the personnel carrier. "Our time is almost up, fangirl. Is there anything else I can give you before I bring you home?"

"I don't suppose you give out your phone number?"

He snorted. "Afraid not. I wouldn't mind giving it to you, but the brass would have fits."

Ironhide actually had a phone number? I'd only been joking. It saddened me, though, that he was so restricted. He had the strength and firepower that he could do anything – anything! – but he let mere humans boss him around. What humility and integrity! I wished the entire world could know about him. "Do you think that will ever change? That the government will ever acknowledge that you're helping us?"

"Perhaps someday."

"Can I give you my phone number?"

"If I want to find you, femme, I'll be able to."

I nodded, looking down. Of course he would. I tried to think of another question for him, but only one remained, and it wasn't the one I wanted to ask.

"Anything else?" he pressed after a long silence.

"Will I ever see you again?" I murmured, dreading the answer.

He was silent for a moment, and I knew. No, this one, magical evening was it.

"I can't make any promises. But," he harrumphed, "if you ever see another Topkick parked next to yours, don't put up such a fuss getting in!"

I laughed, looking up into his blue eyes again. Hope. That's what he'd given me that day almost two years ago. Hope then, hope now. Hope that there were angels to battle the demons, that we weren't on our own against the monsters. Hope that maybe, just maybe, our lives' paths would cross again. "I'll hop right in without a second thought," I promised. "And…thank you, Ironhide."

"You're welcome, Raquel." He set me on my feet again and converted back into his truck shape. Opening the passenger-side door for me, he said, "Let's get you home."


End file.
